Two Models Of The Self: Being, Becoming and the experience of Xeper.
By Adept W.
The left hand path is the path of individualism. It is the spiritual struggle of isolating and transforming your unique psyche as an entity distinct from the Objective Universe and as one existing in its own right. Xeper is the process of coming into being as an individuated, empowered and self-deified consciousness. From the beginning this poses a series of fairly obvious questions. Firstly what is the self\Self? Secondly, how exactly does this entity experience Xeper? Finally, how do we know if the self experiences Xeper?
Below I have outlined two working models of the Self that one can use as
a guide to understanding the rigorous process of initiation. Both
explain the process of how the Self experiences Xeper. The First model
works on the assumption that the self can be divided into five distinct
but interconnected parts:
1) Core Self: The seat of isolate intelligence and individuality. This is
seen as being 'fixed', having relative permanence and as being
non-manifest
2) Daemonic Self: The potential for extension of the core Self. This body
is seen as 'mutable', permanent and, as a process, partakes of the
nature of both manifestation and non-manifestation.
3) Physical Self: The physical body, which is part of the objective
universe and by definition impermanent and manifest.
4) Emotional Self: The intuitive, instinctive, pre-rational, irrational
and trans-rational aspects of consciousness, with a physical route in
the brain and nervous system. Also impermanent and manifest.
5) Intellectual Self: The rational, logical processes of human
consciousness, also linked to physical brain function (however
esoterically) As such this self is impermanent and manifest.
To temper the enthusiasm of this model, the second model explains how the initiatory conclusions of the first model are still valid even if the "Permanent" aspects of the Self turn out to be impermanent or non-existent!
Model One: Manifest\Non-Manifest Dichotomy.
Firstly, as the core Self is non-manifest, ie not a direct part of
the objective universe, it cannot be 'known' and its xeper cannot be
measured in the same way as other aspects of self development can. This
is because the way we 'know' and 'experience' things, including Xeper,
is rooted in the physical and biological apparatus of the impermanent
self. The very criteria by which we judge 'knowledge', 'experience' etc
comes from our place in the Objective Universe as impermanent beings
living in a specific & therefore limited biological and cultural
context. The core Self, being permanent and non-manifest, is unlimited
and cannot be fully comprehended in mundane terms. In a very real sense,
our core Self is alien. However, using this model, the impermanent parts
of the self are projections of the core Self and are projected in their
specific ways because it suits the purposes of that Self. Therefore,
presuming the link between impermanent self and Permanent Self remains
operative after projection (this is how the role of daemonic self as
magical link can be understood) we can assume that certain (not all)
changes in the impermanent self reflect changes taking place in the core
Self. In addition, as the core Self has engaged with the Objective
Universe by means of its projection into it, in some way it should be
subject to the laws of cause and effect. By this I mean that the
communication between selves via the magical link is a two way process.
Bearing this in mind, to some extent you can measure the xepering of the
core Self via the daemonic self through careful observation of effects
of Xeper in the impermanent self. A recent article by Priest X in the
Scroll Of Set explained this clearly. In it, he defined the
state of BEING as being the 'spiritual' self, and BECOMING referring to
the 'mind body and emotional' parts of the self. This coincides with
this model of the Impermanent self being a projection of the permanent
Self. As BECOMING is an extension of BEING. Being-in-motion if you like,
BEING itself is changed by the process of coming into being, i.e.
BECOMING. Therefore a communication dialectic is set up whereby the core
Self experiences Xeper.
Model Two: Limited\Unlimited Dichotomy.
The first question which entered my mind on the creation of Model
One was how do I know that the core Self is permanent? The simple answer
is to say that I do not! I neither have solid evidence of its permanence
nor 'faith' in the assertion for its own sake. It may be more accurate
to say that my working hypothesis suggests that the core Self is
'permanent' in relation to the impermanent parts of the self. After all
is said and done, I am a chemical reaction and within 150 years will be
dead, recycled and probably forgotten. We can call the core Self
'permanent' for the purpose of these dialogues. Whether the Self is
truly 'permanent' is another issue. Let us assume that I am wrong and
that the core Self ceases to exist upon death, or doesn't exist at all
as suggested by Buddhism and implied by the 'Typhonian OTO', or returns
to the "source", or any other possibility. In this case the 'core Self'
still represents a part of the self which is seen to be a) intimately
linked with the whole. & b) non manifest by definition. (ie you can't
dissect a brain and find it, although you may find evidence of its
influence.) As the impermanent parts of the self are undeniably
impermanent and exist within the context of the objective universe, we
can say that this self is manifest and is limited by this manifestation.
Whatever the nature of the core Self, it's non manifest state may let us
define it as un-limited. Non-manifestation is an eternal state as it
exists beyond the scope of the manifest universe. There is always
something which potentially exists but is non-manifest. The
core Self has the potential therefore to be permanent, impermanent or
anything in between. It may be better described as an Unlimited Self,
along with its projection into the Objective Universe, the Limited self.
We can say that at any given moment as defined in the Objective
Universe, the core Self has unlimited potential to BECOME. This comes
about through making something which is 'possible' become manifest
through extension into the objective universe. This then puts limits on
the process of becoming.
The Limited\Unlimited model suggests that the core Self might not
experience Xeper, as this Self is non-manifest and therefore represents
an absence of Being rather than the presence of it. However, the core
Self now becomes the source of Xeper, as it represents infinite
potential to 'come into being'. In this model the core Self is thus a
dynamic void. The act of manifestation via the magical link limits the
core Self, but puts in motion the process of BEING\BECOMING which
straddles the realms of manifestation and non-manifestation. In this
model the magical link may be more accurately described as the 'Abyss',
rather than as an extension of the core Self per se, or personal daemon.
We experience Xeper in a series of photographic snapshots of change, not as an ongoing cinematic narrative. This 'photographic' evidence of Xeper points to things which are now manifest and so are no longer part of the core Self. That Self has been 'changed' by the process.
Xepera Xeper Xeperu.