The Gates of Ganzir

The Headless One: A Snapshot Of First Degree Initiation

Setian W

This brief report is an attempt to nail to paper my experiences of the Gates of Ganzir Pylon 'Bornless One' Project.

My interpretation of this group project involved three aspects:

Ascension of the Serpent: A meditative rite in which seven-chakra points are awakened and visualised as being divided into four major centres. For the purposes of this project they are represented as LILITH (sexual\mechanical) LEVIATHAN (emotional), LUCIFER (intelligence\communication) and SATAN (will). These centres are invoked through chanting and visualisation. The end of the rite comes with an invocation of Set as a unifying principle.
Creation of a model of my Subjective universe. After completion of the Ascension rite, a garden is visualised of rolling red desert under a blanket of a billion stars. A black pyramid stands at the centre of this garden, surrounded by a gulf in the sands which leads to the limitless abyss of Neheh. Two moons appear in the heavens, one representing manifestation\light\LUX, and the other representing non-manifestation\anti-matter\anti-light\NOX. I am visualised as having taken the form of a black fox with nine tails and burning red eyes. This being is one that has appeared to me in dreams sporadically for the last few years, having occasional variation of form. Once the garden is created, 'words of power' are chanted in order to bring about real world change on a pre-conscious level.
The Supreme Invocation of the Daemon: Combination of the hermetic rite of the Headless One with the ascension rite. The ascension rite focuses consciousness into the manifest self through empowering and harmonising key energy centres. The Bornless rite actualises a link with the non-manifest core self. This act generates a state of creative potential, which exists between the subjective and objective universes. This ensuing flow of Being-Becoming can be harnessed for the work of self-transformation.

The effects that this third element has had are interesting. These invocations tend to be very powerful and make me aware of the transitory and fluid nature of objective reality. In these moments the clouds of unknowing are pierced and the universe collapses like a deck of cards. I see this as similar to the SOLVE part of the alchemical formula 'SOLVE et COAGULA' At the same time I feel unsure of how or unable to act on the increased state of being this brings, in order to make it concrete. How to move on and act from this point of awareness is my next task and struggle. Other feelings I have gained are a more grounded knowledge of my own existence and an increasing feeling of sovereignty and realism about my life.

The practise of the rite brings moments of great clarity. These were terrifying at first and bought a sense of alienation and despondency, as I felt unable to anchor that state of reality. Lately they have bought an exhilarating sense of Ecstasy.

The main realisations I've had have involved the utter transient nature of the objective universe. The laws of nature and probability are purely arbitrary approximations, and I feel I have glimpsed the great ocean of chaos that lies beyond the thin veneer of human consciousness and understanding. Looking into the eye of Leviathan, I realise the extent of my own naiveté and ignorance, and has taught me a lot about what it means to come into being.

More disturbingly, my personality, life etc has been revealed to be nothing more than a loose collection of (often conflicting) habits, reactions, neuroses, illusions and delusions. I stared into a mirror hoping to find my soul and found only more mirrors looking back at me, a grotesque parody of reality. My Self remains as illusive as the gold at the end of the rainbow.

Paradoxically, at these moments of emptiness I feel most clarity and most reality. I see clearly the indescribable nature of being, although not how to grasp it. It has shown me that coming into being is a process of self-remembering. These moments of clarity can serve as a guide, a bridge that calls greater being into my life. My next step is to learn to remember myself, and bring this state into wakeful and permanent consciousness. There have been many such moments in my life, all of which have fled like shadows from a torch. I feel now that initiation, the dynamic process of Xeper that drives us on, is a continual game of jumping at shadows, never catching it but always getting better at jumping!

At these moments, I have been able to say with honesty "Xeper", as I realise that each moment is part of a process of coming into being which has been continuous since my birth. Remembrance and realisation of this shatters the sleep of the dreamer, at the same time as creating space for new dreams. I realise that I exist independently of the dream, whatever the nature of that existence is... or the dream for that matter.

Funny old game, this life lark...